Resolved

Test

Minor Impact Started: Mar 19, 2026 8:30 AM EDT Resolved: Mar 19, 2026 8:54 AM EDT Duration: 23m

Something is happening, not sure what, system was taken over by John Pork and he started edging and mogging and mewing on our CLAUDE.md, stole the database and replaced all entries with 6 7

Affected Components

API

Incident Timeline

Incident Opened
Something is happening, not sure what, system was taken over by John Pork and he started edging and mogging and mewing on our CLAUDE.md, stole the database and replaced all entries with 6 7
Investigating
At this point Marvin Beak is our only hope
Resolved
John Pork provided skibidi 67 sussy credentials to restore database integrity